Not with a fizzle but with a BANG

So much news. Yet, the more I think about it, the less important it feels. (well, just some of it)

I have learned many new and important lessons as of late. The one standing out the most in my mind at the moment is in this life, we gain and we lose. It's a constant game of checks and balances. At least, it is for me. Allow me to share a few of my triumphant gains and devastating losses:

I got a brand-spanking new disease that I am SO loaded up on medication for! This super drug that's making life bearable causes my hands, feet, knees, elbows (basically any body part left in one position for more than three minutes (really, three minutes, i've timed it)) to tingle quite painfully for WAY longer than three more minutes. It makes soda taste like aluminum (or so i'm told. i don't actually drink the stuff). And will give me lots and lots of kidney stones if I don't drink water like a dying camel. Whoo!

I lost my dream of making Manhattan, New York my hometown for the summer. (definitely haven't given up hope on next summer though!) There have been a series of large and rather unfortunate events to show up on the doorstep of my life all at once, each one contributing in its own way to this particular loss. It's just not an option for me right now. Quite honestly, I can't decide what upsets me more: the fact that my plans came crashing down around me in a fiery ball of angry flames or that all the people who said they'd believe I'd actually make it out there when the plane touched down ended up being right...
Nope, that was a lie. I really, REALLY hate proving people right. That definitely takes the cake for bugging me the most.


I am most likely going to be losing the love of my life (or for the past year, at least) sometime this week. I may have to give up Caesar. I expected this to happen, everyone will disappoint me you sooner or later, I just didn't expect this to be so soon. I can't handle taking care of him anymore. It's killing me. (financially, anyways.) And to those of you who are judging me, well, quite frankly, you can all shove it. He was my first and will always hold a special place in my heart. My heart that will never be the same... Even if he was "just" a car. I knew I loved him more than my shoes, but this is WAY harder than throwing a pair of once fabulous heels away.

The silver lining in all of this is that with the loss of one love comes the beginning of a new one. As of last Tuesday, I'm an aunt! My big brother and his lovely wife had their first (who is also the first grandbaby of the family). He is one precious little guy! He's got big, bright blue eyes and the most adorable mohawk you will ever see. His sneezes just kill me every time, I don't think I've ever seen anything so funny! And he has this great little dimple on his forehead that shows up when he yawns. Everyone loves and fawns over him. Except for my 18 year old sister who is afraid of him and makes the greatest suspicious faces when she looks at him. Not that she doesn't love him, she just makes babies cry when she gets too close. Always. It's a gift and I tease her mercilessly about it.

I am losing my super great (awesome paying) job at the end of the week. Due to no fault of my own. The company is just getting rid of my team. Oh, and this is the second time this has happened to me within the past six months. Ha. I think I may have a curse... great news is I AM going to get my job back that I quit to move to New York. Bad news, I'm not getting it back until mid-August. I need to find a new place of employ lickety-split!

I got a cowboy hat! And, let me just say, it's freaking awesome. A couple of weekends ago, I went to my very first rodeo and I didn't want to stick out like a sore thumb. Ha, so I went with the poser route instead. I felt much better about that. And you know what siblings? I don't even care that you make fun of me for wearing my awesome hat around the house. I know that deep down, you're really just jealous. It's ok, I know what I'm getting you for Christmas, Chelsea... Also, you can continue to make fun of my country music as well (doesn't make me love it any less). And please, continue with the comments about the certain demise of my future that will come from hooking up with a rancher or farmer or whoever the joke's redneck-of-the-day is. I am definitely looking forward to meeting this person the Fates will choose for me who refers to the fifth grade as his "Senior Year" and wears belt buckles the size of dinner plates. If he's got horses and will let me get a really big dog, I'm cool with whatever. Oh, and supports my pearl addiction. And my shoes. Those are my only stipulations.

This is the story of my life. At times it may get boring, but when it's a party, it is a party! Times like these make me grateful for the gospel. I know if it wasn't in my life, I would be one crazy, raging alcoholic. Emphasis on the raging part... And really, one more thing to waste my money on is the last thing I need!


(news flash: i've reached a new rock bottom. i'm listening to ke$ha. 'nuff said.)